reducing sexual assaults

On facebook, a woman sex educator asked what ideas people had on how to reduce sexual assaults against either adults or kids.

I wrote

it would help to change the mentality of those who abuse, but that will take many years. It would help to educate women of college age that drinking more than 2 drinks at parties is a strong contributing factor to sexual victimization. It would help them to avoid certain drinking games. It would help to encourage all the women and some of the girls to carry weapons and be trained in their use and know the law so as to be able to use them. It would help to have the schools tell the girls and boys that if they are being touched in a way that they do not like, and if it is not mom or dad spanking them, then, it would be good to talk to the school nurse or counselour about it–also, if the girls or boys are told to keep something secret, that that may be a sign of a problem. It would help women to know that the studies have found that active resistance reduces the odds of completion of rape and the same studies have found that there is generally little or no additional risk of nonsexual injury as a result of resistance to a rape attempt. It would help the women to know that the vast majority of rapes are done by unarmed attackers, and to have attended one or several basic self-defense classes. It would help women to know that drawing a weapon is sufficient to stop or deter attacks and most crimes at an estimated 70 to 95% of attacks or robberies. It would help the girls to be trained in the use of scissors, pocket-knives, pens and pencils and to psychologically consider the possibility of abduction and her response to it and her willingness to fight. It would help some of the girls to carry at least pepper spray. It would help some of the girls and women to view actual assaults on youtube, so as to see how easily and how quickly a person may be attacked by another person within 4 feet of her. It would help some of the girls for the schools, parents or pastors to review with them the stories of attacks which have been reported in the news, and how either weapons carry, spray carry or an aware and alert attitude might have prevented or reduced the attack.

Wow . . . preventing guys from attempting “sexual abuse” before the guy makes the attempt . . . That is a question similar to asking about solving world hunger or world peace or robberies . . . That is like asking why some Germans hated some Jews. A certain fraction of people have some worse than usual psychological and spiritual problems. Some of these problems will not be solved except by giving the guy a meaning, meanings, purpose or purposes in life greater than or other than the thrill of some abuse or crime which are done for the fun of it. Some problems will be reduced by spreading the idea of near-death experiences and/or that you reap what you sow and there is justice. In the few cases in which a woman uses a knife, sword or firearm on an attacker, she would probably be preventing future assaults by the dumb-dumb. In 100 to 500 years, I think that society will be filled with enough spiritual meaning and a least some bit of fear of justice that it will not be a problem. The problem is chiefly spiritual. However, it should also be noted that women giving mild and reasonable affection to the men around them is good for them–both the men and the women– psychologically. People who are hugged and/or kissed have greater feelings of personal satisfaction with life in general and with those who hug and kiss them. We had the angry guy in Santa Barbara county who was upset with women at college for not dating or sleeping with him. He got upset, got a firearm and shot seven or so people. The question might include, for this fellow, if he had had some friends who hugged or kissed him in greeting or friendship, would that have diminished his anger and hatred? The Native American Indians before the white new arrivals had fewer restrictions on sex . . . and they are also reported to have had little or no rape in their cultures. So, leaving the men oxytocin-deprived or oxytocin-diminished is, I believe, a poor choice for most women or girls or society, even though there are probably other ways that the guys and boys might be oxytocin filled other than by hugging a friend or cute girl. It would probably help for the psych majors to do more study of oxytocin and to learn even more ways for people to have it . . .

we know from a variety of studies that things as simple as encouraging a person to hug others–persons other than or in addition to one’s wife, hus, bf or gf–at least 5 times a day promotes happiness and satisfaction with life. I suppose that the scientists and psychologists could suggest hugging a tree to determine if there is a similar effect, but until then, we know–1) those who find a consensual way to hug (or kiss) others each day are happier and less depressed; 2) Native American Indian societies with more easily available sex are reported or believed also to have had few or no rapes. You can make assertions all you want, but “we” have the data . . . and “we” or some of us also have a Bible instruction to greet others with affection. Moreover, we also know from the studies that persons who have depression sufficient to be diagnosed as depressed are 3 times more likely to commit crimes of violence such as rape. So, whatever you or society wishes to do to reduce depression is highly likely to reduce the incidence of rape, and I suspect, sexual assault or abuse of the kids. It is a matter of scientific fact; you can draw your own conclusions . . .

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